Suzy Q

Today is the day that I hate. Its my sisters death anniversary. I like to call it Suzys Day...its depressing to remember that 11 years ago I lost my older sister.

I am not going to write a depressing post about how much I miss her. Its very clear how much I do. My depressed feelings about her suddenly leaving are personal. But I want to write things about her that I remember. I was 10 when she died, almost 11. I don't remember much, then things like her favorite color Purple. Her favorite flower, Daisy. Her contagious laugh that still rumbles through my head. Her funny laugh. Or that fact that she was and will always be the best sister I could have ever asked for.

Evelyn will never know her Aunt Suzy, but she'll always have her with her. Evelyn's middle name is Suzanne after her auntie. Suzy would have loved that. She always felt like she was the better sister.

Suzy was 9 years older then me, with no siblings in between. So Suzy was like a 2nd Mom to me. She was the role model I needed to be an awesome Mom. She even took me early school shopping. She even tried to sneek me out of school just to get ice cream, and once let me steer her car. Yes, she was an awesome big sister!

I miss her every step of the way. Even though so days I feel like I have outlived her (she died when she was only 20), I know that she is so happy with where I am at in my life. She would be so proud of the Mom and Wife I am. She'd love that I support my husband so much, and that I try to never take a day for granted. She would just be plain proud of me.

I love you so much Suzy Q!! I know your always looking down over me. I miss you every step of the way, and I will always remember what an amazing big sister you were, and I still believe you are. One day we will reunite, and have good times once again.

For those that don't know Suzy this is her...

this is Suzy and I. 

I really did have the best big sister!!