Thursday, December 6, 2012

Oh! Well Hello There!

Hey ya'll! Sorry I havent posted anything...this week has sure been a busy, horrible, sad, terrifying week for me, and to be honest I just havent given a damn about blogging.

To start this week it was pretty ok...nothing bad really. P had field training for a few days but latley that seems normal. The night before P went away I woke up for some reason in the middle of the night, and had an urge to look at my phone, when I learned a good friend of mine had taken his life.

Now I am not going into detail about how great of friends we were, for a while we had a great relationship, I could probably call him a best friend at one point in my life. He helped me get through a deep dark depression I was in, that he was also in too. I'm so sad that he couldnt find his light in life, and I know he was greeted by his mother in heaven. However, still I am shaken up and sad about this loss. I probably havent talked to him in about 2 years, but this doesnt make the loss any lighter on my heart. I know all to well what he had been going through, and I know how it feels to want to end it all. I can only hope he found the peace he was looking for.

Because P left for the field the morning I found out, I was alone for 2 days. I took bubble baths and wrote his Grandmother a letter. But I couldnt really get out of my funk of being sad for him and his family. I'm glad my mother has decided to go to the funeral, she was friends with his grandmother. I wish I could go too.

I'm having another hard go right now...not sure how I feel about some things but I can only hope it will get better.

I feel bad that I havent been such a hands on Mom with Evelyn the last couple of days, but she doesnt seem to mind. Usually she's pretty happy to just listen to music and watch a little TV, but I did manage to get her crafting/coloring with me.

But of course I cant show you because blogger is a POS. I do have a review coming up...and hopefully I'll be out of this funk soon. :)


Jen said...

I am so sorry for your loss. No matter how long it had been since you spoke it doesn't make it any less painful. Sending lots of prayers to you and the family.

Natalie and Remington said...

He really was such a sweet guy and definitely cared so much for others. I wish he could find out that others cared for him also. I remember how he would always pick on me in a funny way though. Always made me laugh. Even then he always had something nice to say. He had such a big heart. I could always tell something wasn't right and I know that we all beat ourselves up for what we should have said to him, but I know his mom greeted him with open arms.

Chantal said...

I'm so sorry about your friend. That's terrible :(

Kim said...

I'm sorry for your loss. Sending hugs your way.

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