Thursday, October 11, 2012

When to let go...

I have had this family issue going on for about 3 years now. I don't really want to say what the issue is..but lets just say it is one of those issues that has been going on, and its sorta like a repeat cycle. But the cycle is just getting worse.

For starters, no this is not in P's and I's relationship it is with a sibling of mine.

This cycle has been putting me through the ringer, and thank god it started when I got married and I moved. So as much as I hate not being there to support my family, I am so glad I do not have to watch this happen. My parents have given their all to their children, and I'll be honest none of us have ever really appreciated it until we got older...well some of us. Its been very hard to watch my parents make the same mistakes with this sibling of mind.

I always have felt like a therapist to many of my friends and family, I am a very easy person to talk to. So I naturally feel the need to give advice to my parents. I know they hate it but I wish they could see how much they could do different to help this situation.

This situation is a bad one. Its a constant repeat of a cycle I have been watching from the outside and the inside for a while now.

P is sick of hearing me talk about this sibling. He is to the point where he doesn't even like to hear the persons name anymore. Which makes it hard because this is something also affecting me.

The problem is, I am not sure when to just say enough is enough...I cant watch you do this anymore, I cannot see your FB feeds or Instagram photos anymore of you doing this. I cannot find that balance.

I know its not an easy thing to let go of something, or someone. I have done it before. I know how hard of a decision this is. But I just cant watch this sibling hurt themselves any longer. I already lost a sibling way too early and I just don't know how to protect myself, my parents or anyone else from this destruction.

How do you find the balance of knowing when its time to let it go?


Mrs. Duh said...

I'm not sure what advice I can offer... but I can understand where you are coming from. My brother has been having a lot of trouble in the past year or so, and it has been wrecking my family. We had to sort of cut him out of the picture for know and let him hit rock bottom on his own (aka quit enabling him). It's really hard and very sad. I feel pretty lucky that I live far from home and don't have to deal with it daily. I hope you see some relief to your situation soon. Many hugs.

Jen said...

I have been through this before with 3 siblings. Sometimes you just have to let it be and see what happens. I hope you find a solution.

Chantal said...

That's so tough :( I hope you figure something out!

____j said...

I hate that your family is going through this!

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