Saturday, October 30, 2010

Hard-Knock Life

I am finding it really hard to believe that Hubby cannot surprise me anymore.
Honestly, this weekend is supposta be all about him and I spending lots of time together, doing alot of things together. I didnt even want to blog today. I didnt want to get on stupid facebook...but this morning we woke up super later after a incredible low key night and a marathon of The Biggest Loser, and what does Hubby want to do today??? TV until 6 when its time to drive to Chili's and see Saw 7...
I am doing my hardest to not complain, to let him do what he wants....but I am running out of steam.
I have always tried to make him help me with little things around the house, because I stay home I do the majority of everything, all I ask of him is to put him dirty clothes in the hamper and throw his dishes in the dishwasher...pretty simple you think....wrong!!He knows how bad I am trying to not complain, so he pushes my buttons. Let me explain...

This morning we wake up, and make the bed together. He makes himself a microwaved breakfast and I eat my favorite Pop Tarts. We lay around for a while while the first load of laundry is in the dryer and watch 'Rally to Restore Sanity and/or Fear', the laundry finishes....I go upstairs to fold and put away clothes and ask him to please find my Battalion t-shirt which we accidentally packed with all his "crap"...his words "Ummm I am gonna do what I want when I want" I said "Ok well do me a favor and clean out your little army storage area, underneth the stairs so I dont have to do it on Monday"......"Hell no"................"OK THEN!" I go upstairs and fold the laundry and try to not get more mad...I will make him do it anyways tomorrow...a few hours later he decides to make Grilled Chesse while I take a little nap, which I never do..
I am woken up by him asking me what I am doing?..which is a DUH question that's replied with a DUH answer.  He leaves the room leaving the door open which happens to be by the laundry machines, I get a little frustrated and try to tune it out when the BUZZ went off......I wait......nope he wont be folding one load, so I get up and fold it and throw more crap in the washer and dryer. I come down the stairs and his Grilled Cheese mess is everywhere....I do the dishes, with no words and go back up to the bedroom to try and fall asleep....doesn't work, so I come back downstairs and decided....I need advice from non-family members or friends who I know are just gonna take my side and say "oh its ok"

So here I am. I need advice, because this deployment is so freaking close...and I am doing my hardest to not complain...Is it really fair for me not to? I dont get a day off to deal with his deployment, why should he get, which I should have mentioned , the last month off to be Hubby and relax. Or am I being completely selfish by wishing for him to be how he was (most of the time) before this month?
ANY answers would be nice...Put up? or Get Mad?


Ash@Life As Lucy said...

Okay here is the thing. He's probably being a jerk for the reason you named- deployment is close. After going from army brat to wife, and doing countless deployment with my uncle who raised me and the one we just finished with my husband I can tell you one thing all soldiers have in common [at least all the ones I have ever met] THEY LIKE TO PUSH PUSH PUSH RIGHT BEFORE ITS TIME TO LEAVE! Call it a coping mechanism or whatever you want, but that's what they are doing- trying to make their leaving a little less hard on them and you. I am not sure if this is his usual character [as I just started following your blog] but I can definitely say that deployment coming up or not, you have a right to be respected and you shouldn't tolerate him speaking to you or being mean to you just so he can deal... If you anything I'm just a message away <3 Hope it gets better love! BE STRONG

armywife_b2010 said...

alot of people think that its easier to say the good byes when your pissed at eachother. My husband argue alot when it comes close to us moving or deployment we have only been married for almost 8 months. its just all the stresses. it should all pass soon keep your head up and stay strong. :)

C said...

Yes, I think he is absolutely trying to piss you off. So did mine! Before deploying, my husband and I were constantly bickering over stupid stuff. He's stressed, you're stressed, and he's pushing you away because he needs to get out of the "soft and cuddly" mindset to get prepared for deployment.

I think you should bitch him out. First of all, he wants it. Secondly, he's asking for it. Milwives sacrifice constantly, but not being real with your husband doesn't smooth things along-it just breeds resentment. (I know-I've tried!)

Allison C said...

I would try not to get angry and just let him relax before he really can't anymore. Let him enjoy being home without nagging him to do stuff. We still have the comforts of being at home, while they don't. Anyway that's just my opinion.

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